Deep thoughts From The Shadow Within

I've been through a tough time this year....dealing with stress, new experiences, learning to live away from home, school, major axiety attacks and failed relationships. Some I wish I had second chance in now that I feel better and have the anxiety issues behind me for about a month now and I'm back to my happy, enjoyable, relaxed self. If it's one thing I can't get off my mind....for the people I have frayed stuff with, I'm sorry, I apologize from the deepest place in my heart with much affection. And for these people all I ask for is a second chance to show you how I really am, when im not going through all the stuff I've had to deal with when I was going through that anxiety crap. All and all, what im left with is alot of doubts, what would have been If things would have been diffrent without the stress of this anxiety....life is a confusing maze of possibilities dependant on how youu make choices, and I guess I will never fully understand it.

Shadow 2004-09-21

(This deep thought has been made possible to you by: "almost no sleep for the past 3 days")

The hardest part about asking for forgiveness and a second chance is actually doing so. Because you never know quite how doing so is acutally gonna turn on. You can rehearse it over and over, and it could turn out to be the complete oppisite outcome of what you want, like it or not. That, I guess, is why it's so hard to do so. If there was only a way to start the conversation, it would be so much easier. One thing for sure, you can't back down from want you know you have to do or say, or you will regret it for the rest of your life...as one of my close friends says "you will regret more of what you didn't do, than what you did do!". This is a good quote as it clearly states the position I'm in. And this quote can help so many others too in dealing with other tough positions.

Shadow 2004-09-30

How do you say your sorry?
Sometimes words are just not enough!
How do you say your sorry?
Talk is cheap, actions are louder than words!

Shadow 2004-10-08

(As quoted from Norm on Cheers)
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine! That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Added 2004-12-24

(jx i fy)